155

There are about 155 boxes of stuff in our house. Our furniture is here and we can access some of it, some we can’t. The floors look awful from the trash, but what’s the point in picking it up since tomorrow the carpet will be trampled on all over again? The curtains are down, cupboards are bare and the batteries from our stuff are out and all over the place. This is really about to happen. The truck will be here tomorrow to load and drive out.

Tonight we went to the Oakleys to care for their bird and so I could let the kids swim, hoping they would wear themselves out a little and go to bed without much fuss. The Oakleys came home Sunday from their cross/cross country trip (which took them from here to Alabama to Florida to Alabama to Utah and back here), only to get the news of a death in the family as they were coming back from Utah. They got their leave approved and went back to Alabama for the services. They left the two older boys in the care of another friend so they could practice for football and track. They stopped by while we were there and I think tonight was the last time we would see them before we pull out Friday. I won’t see Kelly (their mother) again before we go.

I also got a call from K-Po checking in on us. She told me that every day she gets a little sadder at the thought of our leaving. Kori and I have been friends for six/seven-ish years. Most of her good friends have also left Fort Bliss over the last year or so, so this move is impacting her doubly hard. I’ve known them since their youngest was just a few months old, pretty much all his life.

Then there are my friends from radio- Mr. Randy and Patty. They are the two I have kept tabs on and kept in-touch with (when I’ve been on the ball). I am pretty sure I wont be able to visit with them before we go. But, I love them anyway.

I may never do another St. Jude Radio-thon again. Since the first year I worked at KHEY I worked on the RT and have loved every single minute of it. I love going back to the station and helping them raise money for the best charity in the world. I believe in sinking my heart into this organization because I have seen for myself the miracles they work every day. The kids melt my heart and the mothers and fathers convince me (without even trying) that pieces of heaven are truly here on Earth.

I got fat here, had a baby here, got not fat here, put my husband on planes bound for places I will never visit while uncertain of what the future would bring us, got cancer and got well again, all here. In fourteen years, the majority of my life’s milestones have taken place here, in El Paso. It has been my home but it hasn’t felt that way since Travis left for Fort Jackson.

Even with all that and so much more I wont have the time to talk about, I can’t be sad at leaving. I will truly miss my good friends and you have no idea how much anxiety I have over leaving my doctors, but I feel light and liberated and energized. I am sure there will be some tears flowing somewhere along Interstates 10 and 20, but in every sense of the phrase, the time is indeed now.

I am one of the lucky ones. I married a man who is best described as the total package. He is hot. He is panty-evaporation hot. He is strong and confident. He is loving. He is a great father. He is an achiever. He knows how to love me. And, he loves me well.

How can joining him not outweigh all the sad things about leaving? I am not trying to slight anyone; quite the contrary. I actually am feeling a little guilty that I am so elated to leave. I’ll be rejoining my life already in progress.

But, I just want you all to know how much you do mean to me. Pieces of you have helped form me into who I am. You have encouraged me, helped me hold it together, helped me grow and heal and I know that it will be a very long time before I see some of you again. And 155 boxes cannot contain my overflowing heart.