In an Attempt to Quell My Anger

Current mood: pissy

I have decided that there are enough things and people in this world in need of addressing regarding the things they do, or don't do, which piss me off. I, in my feeble attempt, am trying to be a better person by not exploding all over these people. But then, sometimes I can't help it and explode I do. Many times these are people who truly need to be gone off on, but I wont do it to them because it would bring embarrassment to my family or make things difficult for my husband in his career path, because we all know the Army isn't really always about one's ability to perform well as a Solider, but often about who likes that particular Soldier. So, my lip has permanent teeth imprints on it.

This will be the first of many (I am certain) letters which I intend to use as a stress reliever (because I must release this tension in some suitable way) which will save myself and my family an inordinate amount of grief and embarrassment. These letters will be somewhat annonymous in their address of a particular person, problem or situation. They will help me. They have the potential to make the world a better place when the proper sets of eyes look upon these letters. For others, they will nod in agreement and obtain (I hope) a small bit of satisfaction in knowing they are not alone in their daily fight for sanity.

To my readers: Please feel free to also write letters to suit your own anger/stress/emotional management.

Dear Person (for lack of anything more appropriate to call you),

You called me.

You called me to tell me something which should have been done (oh, let's just round the numbers out and call it) seven weeks ago, was done and ready to be picked up. Now, had it been done correctly and on time, there would have been no need for it to need picking up. If all were in order seven weeks ago, it would have been a part of a natural process and would have fit easily into the schedules of ALL involved. I guess that was just too much to ask. Apparently mediocrity is now appropriate.

When you called me, you asked me to tell you when I would be by. I named a time and then you told me that was not a good time. I asked you what would be a good time for you. You told me, "lunchtime." In military circles, we have all come to accept that lunchtime is any time between the hours of 1130 and 1300, give or take fifteen minutes for the time challenged. You also asked me to call your cell phone to tell you when I was on my way.

I don't much suppose it is important to you that I rearranged my day to do this. I rearranged my entire day to accomidate mediocrity. It is mediocrity which caused the first situation as well as today. Thank you for striving for mediocrity. Your quest for the middle of the road has made the rest of us work harder. Your success in your goal has made the rest of us uncomfortable. Your business in the task of mediocrity has made you an inconsiderate wretch.

I left my home today (where I could have remained to continue laying tile, packing boxes, vacuuming and sweeping floors, sorting seasonal clothing, or any number of what you might deem unimportant jobs) with the sole purpose in seeing you. I left at 1045, got gas (which is now nearly $3.50 a gallon), pulled away from the gas station, picked up my phone and called you to tell you I was on my way and I asked you to call me back to let me know the gameplan. I was pretty certain I would get your voice mail because I was aware of your morning activity. I must have been stupid in my assumption that as soon as that was over you would turn your phone on and listen to the messages waiting for you, to include my own message for you, which you requested I leave, and return calls (as was mentioned in the voicemail in question).

I arrived in the vicinity of your "place" shortly after 1100. I figured I could busy myself with a few minor errands which could have waited for another day until you called me back. Trust me, my errands were done in about twenty minutes. Then, I wasted my time wasting time waiting for you to call me. At 1215 I again called your cell phone and again I got no answer. This time I did not leave a message. I figured you would see my number and realize it might be a little important for you to call me back. Again, my own stupidity is working against me, right?

With nary a phone ring by 1315, I became a bit more angry and decided to take matters into my own hands. I went to your building without waiting for you to call me to tell me it was a good time, even though you told me it would be a good time, but it was apparently not a good time... for you. As I entered, there was one person who asked if he could help me. When I explained my presence, he simply said he had no idea and that you were in a meeting and would be there for some time, as it had just begun. Yes, I got a little (lot) snippy with this person and for that I am a little sorry. I then saw someone I know and like and exchanged pleasantries. I left the building immediately thereafter.

So, all in all, you have wasted my day. I had plans for my time. I changed them to accomodate you. My whole day went right down the crapper because of you. It really should have come as no great surprise to me that this might occur, as you have a proven track record of making excuses for things which don't always happen all that properly. Now that we've established that you messed with me and my time, what are we going to do about the gas I wasted in my time wasting caused by you? Should I bill you?

I realize that in your mind I am not important. I can accept that and it does not hurt my feelings. However, let me assure you that although my time may not be as expensive as yours, it is equally as valuable.

Now that you must again recitfy this situation, which never had to occur in the first place, seven weeks ago or today, I hope it is uncomfortable for you. I hope you have to explain it to someone "above" you who questions your ability to do your job. Do not come by my home. I do not care to see you and I do not care to talk to you. You will not be welcomed here. Only friends and potential buyers are welcome here.

In other words, stick it in the mail.

Thank you,
Stacie